Wow. It's been a minute y'all!
Seriously.
I apologize to my readers, as well as myself, for not keeping up on my blog. Perhaps it is the reason I've been going mental lately. An outlet to channel and expel my thoughts, feelings, rage, etc. is needed. And this blog is that channel. This entry probably won't be too heavy. But it's better than nothing I suppose. And I usually get riled up/excited while/after writing a blog!
So...one whole fricking month has elapsed since I quit smoking. Boo yeah! Monday was 4 weeks...so today makes it about 31 days. Like a full MONTH! I can't even believe it. I don't even care about my patches anymore. I forgot to wear one yesterday, and purposely forgot again today. The only time I have trouble is when I see someone smoking. Then I smell it. UGH! Funk that!
Last Friday, while rockin' pretty hard, a lot of people were smoking around me. At first, I had a little argument with myself inside my head. Arguing for and against lighting one up. While debating, I realized EWW! This shit is gross! And I didn't have one! :D
But I am a bit worried about Vegas. The temptation to blast a Marlie Marl...man it's gonna be tough. But I think I can do it. I've been doing awesome. And on the off chance I should fail, well...I will stop again immediately. It'd just be a bump in the road. But one I'd rather avoid. Because I'm a very anal person, and even if I just had a drag, I'd feel like I have to start all over again. Gonna be tough when drinking though...
As for beefcaking? Well the good news is, I did put on a few pounds (last time I checked). I really need to buy a scale. It's pretty tough to track results. Bad news is, I've kinda fallen off on the shakes and stuff. At least, I'm not having 2/day like I should be. One here and there...however, it's so close to my trip, that I'm gonna say eff it, and when I get back, I'll be taking it much more seriously. Especially with spring and such coming up. I haven't been bowflexing at all. BUT - I have been doing some fitness exercises at home myself. And although I've been slacking over all, improvements are still there. I can do more and more situps/pushups then I thought I would be able to in such a short time.
I'm definitely noticing some muscle definition appearing in my arms, shoulders, chest, stomach, etc. I'm pretty pumped! Because my effort has been half assed at best, and I'm already seeing improvement. Wait til I start hammering those shakes down and hitting the gym full torque! God forbid I get a hold of some HgH! I'll be a beast!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BEEFCAAAAAAAAAKE! Haha!
Another reason I haven't been hittin' this blog lately...well...I haven't done anything worth writing about! I haven't played any poker since my huge drop session/quick weekend session in Calgary. Just pissed around a bit online with some sit 'n go's and such, but nothing worth talking about. I need to play some this weekend to get primed up for Vegas!
Man am I getting excited about Vegas!! Lately, I was almost feeling apprehensive about it. Something was bothering me about this trip...I have a pretty good idea where these feelings were coming from. But I've dealt with it mentally. This bullshit derives from my inabilities to cope with stress or situations that are beyond my control. But eff that. Reggie and I are gonna be sippin' on some Ole' E, walkin' down the strip, not givin' a mothafuck! It's gonna be so sweet! Poker, booze, shopping, food, bit...errr, yeah... :D Good times ahead! I can't wait!
Now I just have to deal with all my shit before I leave! I need to finish cleaning up my house, and have all my shit together. Or I won't even be able to sleep! I'm worried about leaving my babies...I always miss them. But at least this time, someone will be there for them everyday. At least, he better be!
One more thing...Detroit what?!?! 6 in a row! Boo yeah! After a hideous winless-in-7-games stretch, we are back on track. God I love Hossa...almost as much as Datsyuk! So ghey...but I can't help it! They are so deadly!!!!!!!!!
Anyways, I'm sure I'll have more to write about at some point in the next couple days. But I should probably get to bed.
I don't wanna talk about wars between nations.
Not right now
You dont know how beautiful
You are...
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Monday, February 2, 2009
And that is why no one will remember your name...
Been a while...
3 weeks today...it's official! As stated in my first entry, I decided that was my main objective. I don't remember who told me 3 weeks was the make or break point. I don't even know if it's remotely true. But it gave me something to shoot for. And as far as I can recall, I've never made it this far in any of my attempts. Yay me!
To be honest, I haven't felt that much better. Not like I expected to anyway. I have been extremely fatigued as of late. That can be explained partially by my habit of staying up too late, losing track of time, etc. However, I have been finding lately, that I am not sleeping well at all. I find myself feeling like I've been awake all night, or often waking up at very random intervals throughout the night. Almost watching the clock if you will...I just don't get it. Perhaps I am still adjusting...I used to sleep like a baby last year.
I also haven't noticed a significant increase in taste/smell, which apparently occurs within days of quitting. But perhaps I've just been too busy or distracted to notice these improvements. Nonetheless, I can't really say I feel worse. And at least I don't have that shitty smell around me. Saving money also, obviously. The only thing I'm worried about now is resisting the temptations in Vegas. That will be the true test.
Working out hasn't been super regular either. But I'm doing my best to remain exercising semi-regularly at worst. According to Chel's scale, I have gained 8.5 lbs. Subtract clothing weight and minor inaccuracies, and I'm still up a good 5 lbs already. Not bad considering I'm not following the routine very well. I intend to keep up as best I can, and get better.
Poker has experienced some variance. Although I was incredibly card dead, I blame it mostly on lack of self control, bad play, frustration and fatigue. I've set my stop loss at 2 buyins, and I let tilt convince me to buy in again to get revenge on some old prick who slow rolled me. I certainly got my revenge. After rivering the nut straight, I put out a large value bet. I acted conspicuously, and induced a call. He looked at me to open my hand and I said "Nice call...." and sighed...thinking he had won, he looked relieved. I then turned over my hand and said "I just have the nuts. Ship it you slowrolling prick!" Even the dealer got a kick out of it. He left the table right after that LOL...I then continued my downward spiral and dropped a total of 4 buyins. So essentially, it's like two losing sessions in a row. Certainly not unheard of, but definitely unnecessary.
I played some more this weekend in Calgary. After my original Saturday plans were cancelled, my wonderful friend invited me to Calgary for a late celebration of my bday. Poker on Saturday night went pretty well, until one of the last hands I played. I ended up almost dead even after losing a large pot I should not have even been in, and did not have the discipline to fold, despite being quite sure I was beat. Alcohol may have been a contributing factor... :P
We then made our way over to Ducky's for some karaokee. As usual, I get hyped up, but find it incredibly difficult to choose a song and become very nervous. Once I get that first song out of the way, I have an insatiable urge to sing more. Tiff thought it would be a good idea for us to sing "Hollaback Girl" by Gwen Stefani. Being that this song is by a female vocalist, I was even more nervous than usual. Fortunately, I have a pretty high vocal span so I can hold my own. There was a pretty rambunctious crowd gathered in front of the stage and I thought we put on a good performance. Tiff did laugh through half the song, so I went solo often! LOL Good times, and of course, did not get any more songs in as it was too late.
A drama filled evening ensued, which involved Tiff standing on the table in a restaurant, us nearly getting thrown out, worrying about the waiter spitting in to our food (or worse), getting kicked out of a cab, etc. Sigh...but it was fun. :) A short session of poker followed the next morning/afternoon, where Tiff went on a heater and ended up +500! Good for you Tiff! I ended up +50 or so, after making a questionable call and losing a big pot. Oh well.
Despite being on the verge of collapse, I decided to visit my lovely sister and favorite brother in law. :) Decided to watch the game with Killa B. Superbowl was quite entertaining, despite my lack of interest in NFL, or football in general for that matter. I cheered for Arizona, and was a bit miffed by some of the officiating as well as the last minute scoring drive for the win by Pittsburgh...but a very entertaining game and well played by both sides.
Detroit finally broke out of their slump tonight with a win over the lacklustre St. Louis Blues (thank fuck). Squeaked out a win in a shootout, despite playing a very bad game overall. Thank God for Marian Hossa! 2 goals and the shootout winner! Atta boy! :) Hope we can retain him next year...
Anyways, I should get to bed, just thought I'd blast out a quick blog. I have many things on my mind, so I suppose entries will become more frequent and interesting if time permits.
V
3 weeks today...it's official! As stated in my first entry, I decided that was my main objective. I don't remember who told me 3 weeks was the make or break point. I don't even know if it's remotely true. But it gave me something to shoot for. And as far as I can recall, I've never made it this far in any of my attempts. Yay me!
To be honest, I haven't felt that much better. Not like I expected to anyway. I have been extremely fatigued as of late. That can be explained partially by my habit of staying up too late, losing track of time, etc. However, I have been finding lately, that I am not sleeping well at all. I find myself feeling like I've been awake all night, or often waking up at very random intervals throughout the night. Almost watching the clock if you will...I just don't get it. Perhaps I am still adjusting...I used to sleep like a baby last year.
I also haven't noticed a significant increase in taste/smell, which apparently occurs within days of quitting. But perhaps I've just been too busy or distracted to notice these improvements. Nonetheless, I can't really say I feel worse. And at least I don't have that shitty smell around me. Saving money also, obviously. The only thing I'm worried about now is resisting the temptations in Vegas. That will be the true test.
Working out hasn't been super regular either. But I'm doing my best to remain exercising semi-regularly at worst. According to Chel's scale, I have gained 8.5 lbs. Subtract clothing weight and minor inaccuracies, and I'm still up a good 5 lbs already. Not bad considering I'm not following the routine very well. I intend to keep up as best I can, and get better.
Poker has experienced some variance. Although I was incredibly card dead, I blame it mostly on lack of self control, bad play, frustration and fatigue. I've set my stop loss at 2 buyins, and I let tilt convince me to buy in again to get revenge on some old prick who slow rolled me. I certainly got my revenge. After rivering the nut straight, I put out a large value bet. I acted conspicuously, and induced a call. He looked at me to open my hand and I said "Nice call...." and sighed...thinking he had won, he looked relieved. I then turned over my hand and said "I just have the nuts. Ship it you slowrolling prick!" Even the dealer got a kick out of it. He left the table right after that LOL...I then continued my downward spiral and dropped a total of 4 buyins. So essentially, it's like two losing sessions in a row. Certainly not unheard of, but definitely unnecessary.
I played some more this weekend in Calgary. After my original Saturday plans were cancelled, my wonderful friend invited me to Calgary for a late celebration of my bday. Poker on Saturday night went pretty well, until one of the last hands I played. I ended up almost dead even after losing a large pot I should not have even been in, and did not have the discipline to fold, despite being quite sure I was beat. Alcohol may have been a contributing factor... :P
We then made our way over to Ducky's for some karaokee. As usual, I get hyped up, but find it incredibly difficult to choose a song and become very nervous. Once I get that first song out of the way, I have an insatiable urge to sing more. Tiff thought it would be a good idea for us to sing "Hollaback Girl" by Gwen Stefani. Being that this song is by a female vocalist, I was even more nervous than usual. Fortunately, I have a pretty high vocal span so I can hold my own. There was a pretty rambunctious crowd gathered in front of the stage and I thought we put on a good performance. Tiff did laugh through half the song, so I went solo often! LOL Good times, and of course, did not get any more songs in as it was too late.
A drama filled evening ensued, which involved Tiff standing on the table in a restaurant, us nearly getting thrown out, worrying about the waiter spitting in to our food (or worse), getting kicked out of a cab, etc. Sigh...but it was fun. :) A short session of poker followed the next morning/afternoon, where Tiff went on a heater and ended up +500! Good for you Tiff! I ended up +50 or so, after making a questionable call and losing a big pot. Oh well.
Despite being on the verge of collapse, I decided to visit my lovely sister and favorite brother in law. :) Decided to watch the game with Killa B. Superbowl was quite entertaining, despite my lack of interest in NFL, or football in general for that matter. I cheered for Arizona, and was a bit miffed by some of the officiating as well as the last minute scoring drive for the win by Pittsburgh...but a very entertaining game and well played by both sides.
Detroit finally broke out of their slump tonight with a win over the lacklustre St. Louis Blues (thank fuck). Squeaked out a win in a shootout, despite playing a very bad game overall. Thank God for Marian Hossa! 2 goals and the shootout winner! Atta boy! :) Hope we can retain him next year...
Anyways, I should get to bed, just thought I'd blast out a quick blog. I have many things on my mind, so I suppose entries will become more frequent and interesting if time permits.
V
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